Only in the modern era has it become
economically feasible for cultures to stress the importance of
personal space. In general, humans have been required to share space
with others nearly 24 hours per day. It was historically a
requirement to work in teams, socialize with neighbors, and sleep as
a family. In many modern cultures this is no longer true. In many
ways this is great. Humans can finely develop their ideas and
aspirations independent of communal pressures. However, it seems
that when humans become too attached to privacy, important
traditional values, such as sense of community and respect for
elderly, are lost, significantly harming society's general happiness.
In many parts of the world the
traditional lack of privacy remains. When I lived in rural Mali, I
was stunned to observe that the concept of privacy hardly existed.
Since houses were dark and hot they were mostly just used for
storage, and people's lives took place outside in public. People
worked outside. People slept outside. People did business outside.
People socialized outside. Women washed clothes at the local spring,
and even bathed publicly at the water source. Unless you were going
to the bathroom (and by bathroom I mean a field away from the
village), there was really no where to go to find private space. If
they could have afforded it I believe the people of my village would
have build private spaces, but instead they had to learn to live in
close proximity. The result was an impressive support system where
neighbors constantly checked up on each other and worked together to
produce and properly distribute as much food as possible. Their
survival depended on their support network.
In Morocco too, I have experienced the
need to share space. The families I've lived with in Morocco would
share rooms for sleeping; multiple individuals dividing up couch
lengths. The idea is to conserve money, but an important result is a
strong family bond. Lacking employment opportunities, it is not
unusual for several generations to be living in the same space. Even
after marriage, a son may not leave the household. Again, I believe
they would if they could, but instead they learn to live in close
proximity with other family members, developing a support system
where everyone is taken care of.
The world's wealthier countries no
longer need family or community support to ensure survival, and so
reliance on family and neighbors has waned. Such independence is
glorified in many contemporary cultures, as people are no longer
restricted to follow the same beliefs and aspirations of the family
they happen to have been born into. Such freedom has certainly
produced many brilliant individuals and helped mitigate conflict.
America is especially obsessed with the idea of independence and
personal space. Our capitalist spirit doesn't like to share. As
soon as they finish high school American teenagers strive to attain
freedom from their parents. The layout of American towns is
essentially a grid of private properties. We would never share a
room with anybody except a partner. America is crazy about privacy
Unfortunately, it seems all too natural
to abuse the luxury of being able to afford personal space,
ultimately harming society's well-being.
As demonstrated by those wealthy enough
to afford it, there is a universal urge in humans to have personal
space. For the first time in human history, entire cultures can
afford privacy for all its individuals. When we stop sharing space
though, we tend to let go of certain human attributes that have been
with us for tens of thousands of years. We forget how important it
is to know how to tolerate the presence of others and we become
detached from family and community. When sharing space, individuals
are forced to share struggles and celebrations, and the bonding that
occurs is essential to human happiness.
The worst ramification of America's
obsession with independence and privacy is our treatment of the
elderly. Before the modern world became obsessed with independence
from our family, senior citizens had been regarded with utmost
respect. Age meant wisdom, and for most of human history wisdom is
all we had to go off. The elderly are deeply respected in most
cultures, and contribute to the social dynamics of the community. In
America we prefer to keep them on the sidelines. I often think about
how demeaning it is for me to be doing development work to another
country. Sure, there are things Morocco needs to change to improve
the lives of its people, but for me to pretend to know what these
things are because I am American is ridiculous. There is plenty of
change and development that needs to happen in America too (I'm
pretty sure we have the least sustainable lifestyle and humanity
would surely be doomed if all seven billion of us consumed as much as
Americans). If I imagine volunteers being sent from Morocco to
America to help us develop, I picture workshops promoting respect for
the elderly, telling us to learn from their wisdom and incorporate
them into the daily family routine. Indeed, I don't believe
America's senior citizens to be a happy demographic.
Another negative consequence of
America's obsession with privacy is age segregation. Since we become
detached from family and community, we create support networks from
our peers. I hardly know how to act around kids or old people
because I have no practice at it. I develop my world view only from
like minded friends, and have trouble empathizing with the youth or
elderly. I admire Moroccans ability to treat kids like they would
younger siblings and the elderly like their own parents. The ages of
the kids in the English class I teach range from eleven to seventeen
and they are all affection to one another. I also admire the smiles
on old people's faces, who are so happy to watch their grandchildren
grow up in the same neighborhood as them.
Perhaps I've been a little harsh on
America's obsession with privacy. A lot of it stems from my guilt of
living on my own continent where the lives of family and friends back
home hardly concern me. Africa has taught me that this is not a
healthy attitude to have. It is possible to have a sense of family
and community even if you don't share the same space (let alone the
same continent) and I plan on improving mine. Important human
behaviors were developed from a need to share space, and even though
these behaviors are no longer required for survival, they ought to be
continued since we are evolved to expect them. These behaviors
include whatever demonstrates love and support for our family and
community/friends, as a replacement for not sharing space with them.
